My husband goes to dating sites, what to do?
The Internet is an incredible tool to find love, and we can chat with singles from all over the world, visit thousands of profiles according to search criteria such as geolocation, and make the meeting that will change our lives. Yes but that’s it is when you are single!
It is often wrongly thought that these tools are reserved for the 18-30 generation, but that is not the case at all. Fortunately, there is no age limit, and we can meet people who are 18, 35 or 55 years old on the net. On the other hand, everyone is not necessarily sincere in their approach, and there are people in pairs (often men), only in search of a story of a night or even an extramarital relationship. So it’s not just singles on the web who are looking for love, and you’ve realized that at your own expense.
A few days or weeks ago you noticed something abnormal on your computer or your companion’s phone. At first, it was just a hunch, then he was more and more distant, and you started to ask questions and ask yourself but does my husband go to dating sites? You wanted to be clear, and you came across a website or an application that allows you to connect singles. Nevertheless, to your knowledge you had not broken, you were always married or together, so tricky to understand such an act, you take it as pure treason.
So you’re trying to understand why he got there, wondering what to do now and how to behave. I’m just pointing you through this article.
Why is my husband registered on dating sites?
Of course, there are explanations; we can not say he goes to dating sites because “men are all bastards! “. Not only would it be reductive to behave as well, but in addition to denying the problems of a couple, it would endanger your union because it would reveal an inability to become aware of the shortcomings in the relationship. But I want to qualify or clarify: it does not mean that you are at fault. When we come to this stage, it is useless to look for a responsible and to send back the ball, we must act quickly and well and that inevitably passes by the understanding of the reasons which led him to s’ register on a dating site, adopt a guy and others.
One of the first things to explain is why this is the case. Even if you think that all the men are unfaithful and that it is impossible to fall on type who will be sincere and honest towards you, all do not take the risk to register on a site of meeting and to put in harm their marriage or their story. The real fundamental problem is not that men are assholes, but that if he behaved that way, there is a reason. From the moment you become aware of this aspect, you will be able to reverse the trend, if you choose, to show how important you are to him.
Now let’s get to the point by pointing out more precisely what can lead him to look for another woman on a dating site. To go faster, I prefer to list the reasons below because the fact to go into detail would be too long given the many possibilities. So I chose to mention the 10 most frequent cases. If you have trouble understanding his gesture or do not recognize yourself in these examples, do not panic is that your companion has more specific needs and to evoke them I direct you to coach. To book a session as quickly as possible, I invite you immediately to visit the page provided for this purpose by clicking here.
The 6 sexual reasons why he wants to meet another woman
Of course the main reason concerns the change of sexual partner. He wants novelty, and his gesture is often related to sex. Either he is frustrated because you do not meet his expectations, or he wants something new because there was weariness or a routine. Discover the 5 main reasons:
- He wants to meet another woman via a dating site to have sex and satisfy new fantasies. There are sites only for married men and women on whom no serious relationship is envisaged. But that does not mean that you should not worry.
- He thinks you do not have enough sex.
- He wants to avoid falling into a routine in bed, or he is frustrated by your reports because they lack spice and he can no longer enjoy as before. To give him orgasms worthy of the name, I suggest you read this article: how to enjoy his man as ever!
- He feels less attraction for you physically.
- He has blockages or a fear of not satisfying you.
- In turn, he wonders how to make a woman enjoy and wants to know if your needs under the duvet are also those of other women.
The other five reasons that led him to put himself on a dating site
But contrary to what you can think there are many reasons other than sexuality that can lead a man to register on a dating site. He did not wake up this morning saying, “I’m going to cheat on my wife,” but he still decided to sign up, pay, and spend time on it. This shows that he is in an active process. And that often means that there is a deeper problem in the couple. For you to understand a little better my reasoning, here are the five most common reasons:
- He wants to test his power of seduction again and has written description on a dating site to evaluate his sex appeal.
- He wants to have fun and spend time talking with another woman. It can go from virtual friendship to virtual infidelity.
- He wants to move on because he feels like things are not going well in your relationship.
- He followed his single friends by registering on the site, but he fell in love at first sight.
- Over time he has had fewer feelings for you and so he tries to relive moments of passion, as at the beginning of a story.
There is no less serious or more severe cause than another. It is, therefore, necessary to systematically analyze the reasons and find the way out of this situation. But the first question you have to answer often do I have to tell him that I know everything or not. To realize it keeps reading!
My husband goes to dating sites, must I admit that I know everything?
When we say “my husband goes to dating sites” we also often wonder how to react and whether to talk to him or leave him and wait for him to stop for example. It is true that it is not easy to decide, the man we love, the one with whom we built something is looking for someone else. Surely it is even more difficult to pretend to know nothing and wait until he continues his life. So there are two possible solutions in your situation, and it’s up to you. You can expect and hope that it changes itself without necessarily intervening by telling you that you know everything, and so you avoid a face to face so as not to create conflicts.
But it is clear that if your man is looking for someone else because it is a priori what he does by being on such a site or an application, do not be ashamed or afraid of him to say, we must clarify things because we must immediately assume things. It is not by postponing the deadline that we will improve things because not only will you ruminate on your side but also it may give him more time to fork to infidelity.
On the other hand, there is a way of doing things. “So how to act when my husband signed up on a dating site? That’s the question you need to ask yourself. You do not know why or how to approach the subject, and this is what we are going to examine because it is what can determine the success or not a return to grace in his eyes. You have understood that I am in favor of the second preferred option, that is to say, rather than wait until it is better to have a conversation with him, but this discussion must be conducted on time.
At this point, the communication must be optimal, and you must not let the emotions guide yourself. Of course, his gesture is unacceptable, and you must make him understand, but also ask him for explanations because his excuses will not be sufficient. I am aware that it is not easy to implement and that is why I recommend you read carefully my book 35 rules to save your couple, who will answer your questions if you want to communicate a good way and have the right attitude.
This conversation will be essential because it will give indicators on his wishes, why you are telling you my guy goes to dating sites and therefore his intentions, and all of these elements will allow you to take the right decision about whether to forgive him or not.
My husband chats with other women, should I leave him or stay?
The first thing I wanted to say to you is this: you should not make a decision that you would regret within 2 or 3 days. The other thing that is also very important and that this decision must come from you and not your friends, your family or even a coach! When we admit to his entourage that my guy is registered on a dating site, there are bound to be judgments or the eyes of others who will come to disturb you. You must avoid making a decision too quickly.
Many women in this situation wonder if we should not take the lead to avoid being cuckold and that goes through a breakup. But by making this choice out of pride, many come back, and their husband or boyfriend then feels all-powerful. This is exactly what to avoid. If you come back because you realize that you made the wrong decision, then you must make sure that your story is revived by adopting certain behaviors.
Often, we want to make him pay for his gesture, his desire to go elsewhere and we say in this way that we will suffer less, we will not be the one who was even more betrayed. It can also be made aware of our importance by reacting actively. But it’s not easy to do because you need resources out of the ordinary. Staying with a man who goes to dating sites can also be hurtful, so this is a factor to consider.
However, if you are in this situation and you are waiting for a change you should not consider that it is in your behavior in the same way that you will push it to engage again. As I explained to you a little earlier, if he wanted to go elsewhere and he had the temptation to be unfaithful, it’s because there was a recurring problem, it’s precisely by setting the latter that you will finally be able to move forward and relaunch your story. Once again if that’s your wish. In these moments, listen only to yourself and act with reason.